Effective communication is very vital in every walk of life; more so in maintaining a healthy and harmonious relationship, though it is not easy at times. Many times, there will be skirmishes between couple for very minor reasons and they stop talking to each other. Sometimes both the couple will enter into a heated argument on some trivial issues.
If these negative trends between partners become a regular feature, it will cast a shadow on their relationship and frequent infighting and quarrels make their lives miserable. This situation will not only be agonizing and embarrassing but the relationship itself may be in jeopardy.
The silver lining is that people can change their communication styles if they want to strengthen the relationships rather than spoiling them. People have different ways of communicating. Our styles of communication may not be at times effectual as they are deep-seated, developed over several years and mostly from childhood learnt from our parents and others.
In communication, it is important how one conveys the message or information so that the other person easily understands and fulfills what the person communicating wants. If someone wants his or her partner to do something, here are a few communication options that might be effective.
Suppose there is some hesitation in asking her husband or partner directly what she wants, the woman can throw sufficient hints so that he understands and does what she wants him to do. However, the problem with this approach is that she may not be certain that the partner has understood what she tried to convey.
Either he may not understand or may pretend that he has not understood if he does not want to comply with her request. In other words, this approach may not be dependable to get the desired results.
If someone wants that her partner should do something for her, the tone in which the request is conveyed is very important. If the tone is authoritative, the partner will refuse to oblige her. Suppose she persists with her demands and tries to convince him, he will oppose even more vehemently.
If she does not get what she wants, she blames her partner leading to a series of arguments and her partner may even withdraw from the scene. The woman might also brood over the matter and withdraw. Ultimately, both the partners would be angry with each other.
Browbeating and using other negative expressions in order to get what she wants will also not work. Some women will make the life of her partner miserable by upsetting him in different ways such as crying, threatening and so on.
The net result is that next time the partner would not like to bear all this undesirable and negative tactics of his partner and does what she wants without prolonging the issue. Men also often adopt these tactics. In any case, this will affect the relationship.
None of these techniques are successful styles of communication and in this example, if the wife does not get her requirements fulfilled by her husband, there will be growing bitterness between them. This animosity slowly builds up and eventually blows up out of proportion leading to possible breakup in relationship.
The Correct Approach
If the wife wants to get certain jobs done from her partner, the effective method of communicating her request is in a simple, polite and matured manner. She must be prepared to accept her partner’s sincere response without attributing any motives.
One should repose faith in the partner and conclude that the partner would certainly fulfill her needs if he is capable of doing so. The wife, on her part, should appreciate when he does the job. Constructive or encouraging communication methods are very effective in maintaining and strengthening a relationship that is filled with joy, mutual love and sense of fulfillment. In such a relationship, there is no place for mistrust and emotional outbursts.